Sunday 13 May 2012

A very special engagement


Despite the highs of sari shopping, I was nervous about the actual wearing of my glitzy new outfit and the many potential dangers I envisaged. However, this was to be my first Sri Lankan engagement and I was determined to enjoy it. 

Here in Sri Lanka, the engagement is the legally binding event and therefore holds far more importance than the wedding itself. Usually the two happen on the same day, but in this instance we were to celebrate the engagement a full 4 months prior to the wedding. I'm still a little unclear as to exactly why. However, as is the way in Sri Lanka, it has to do with the calculation of the most auspicious time. Sri Lankans regularly consult astrological charts to decide on the best time for many of life's important events. For the bride and groom in this instance, the most auspicious time was deemed to be at 10am on may 9th, and so the 9th may it was. 

The day was to begin early and so we stayed at the hotel where the ceremony would take place. Myself and another volunteer were to host the bride and her helper in our room from 6am where she would get dressed and be made up in good time for the 9am photo shoot. We had been told that the "help" in question was a boy who would also assist us into our saris. There was much speculation ahead of time about "sari boy" (as he came to be known) and some concern and amusement about how he might cope with a group of foreigners parading round in underskirts and sari jackets. Further questioning revealed that the sari boy was in fact a 25 year old man, but a very "innocent man"we were told, leading to further hilarity. However, SARI BOY (a Sri Lankan superhero of the highest order) turned out to be a professional through and through. Having worked his magic on the beautiful bride, he effortlessly wrapped, tucked, smoothed and folded us into our outfits.  

Freshly wrapped, thermostat working
A little later...getting hotter and pinker













And so, the day itself. After the signing and witnessing of the engagement and a declaration that they were now husband and wife, the celebrations began. Despite having a decidedly Sri Lankan flavour, there are clearly some things that are universal at such events. There was the cutting of a cake, a band, some bad daytime dancing (I speak only for myself, it's rather tricky dancing in a sari), a slightly sozzled uncle in the corner, plenty of food, and a few speeches. It was a great day. The bride's family were incredibly warm and welcoming of the strange foreigners and everyone had fun. 

As for the anticipated dangers of wearing a sari, I was pleasantly surprised. Yes there was rather a lot of material wrapped around me, yes it was hot, yes my face was rather pink and shiny, and yes I did almost trip up on several occasions. However, limiting the sri lankan rum to just a couple of drinks was a wise move. And having a gaggle of Sri Lankan women around you at all times is a great help. Not only can they advise on the logistics of a sari toilet visit, but I learnt from experience that they are also ready to intervene at lightening speed and with great proficiency when your sari threatens to undo!
My bat girl sari cape and very pink
face, inspiration for the wedding colour scheme

So, I look forward to the wedding in September where it seems I will be ................drum roll............... one of the bridesmaids! Yes, you heard it here first! And rumour has it, the bride is planning the colour scheme to match the colour of my hot and sweaty face. Me in a pink sari! ?!?!?!? How did this happen?




8 comments:

  1. Very well written Beth. I absolutely loved that you were to wear a sari but most of the female family members didn't. Maybe a bit of a plot to see what they could make the white people do. Regardless, I hope to be there with you at the wedding also struggling to keep my sari tied properly.

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    1. Thanks Trina, yes, I think there was definitely a plot. Look forward to sharing the sari experience with you at the other big day.

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  2. wow! you look stunning. sounds like a lot of fun!

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  3. Hi Beth, looking very chic in your blue sari.
    I don't suppose that sari modelling was in your top 10 list of things to do in Sri Lanka :)
    Looking forward to seeing the follow-up performance.
    Lots of love,
    Jim & Terry
    XX

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    1. Thanks guys. No it wasn't in my top 10, but hey, life can be strange can't it?! Love to you all xx

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  4. I love that you have settled in so well that you have wangled a very significant role at a local wedding! Brilliant xxx (Tubster)

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  5. Brilliant, and all a little bit crazy!xxx

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